Question

Posted January 9, 2013

I withdraw and feel bitter/jealous very quickly if I perceive a slight, disloyalty, etc from one of my friends….  I begin to doubt if they really want to be friends with me, or value my friendship at all- and it makes it a huge struggle to just act normal and not “cool”  towards friends(even close friends.)   I have dealt with those feelings so much and caused myself a LOT of problems.  (I think this is a dreamer gal fault!)   So, how can I change those feelings before they damage my friendships(or my sanity?)

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  1. swifttohear

    “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (Phil. 4:6-7).

    Jesus was “meek and lowly in heart”, which means that He did not get offended by the lost sinners and wicked Pharisees that surrounded Him every day even though He had every reason to be offended. He esteemed each one of us better than Himself, condescending to our level in order to serve and save us.

    Often, the reason we feel offended is because of our overactive egos. We esteem ourselves quite highly because by nature, we love ourselves and seek our own will and self-determination over that of others. Jesus asks us to deny that self, to bear our burdens, and to follow His perfect example. When we feel slighted or jealous, it’s because our egos are crying out in pride for attention, adoration, glory, and vengeance. These things are the “lusts of our flesh” which “war against the soul”. If we are to follow Jesus’ example, we are to deny our egos and stop thinking so highly of ourselves. This is called crucifying our flesh (“And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts” Galatians 5:24). When we take on a godly humility, we become far more likable, sincere, and kind. When we lean on Christ, seeking and finding our true identity in Him, as children of the Living God, it’s amazing how those perceived slights fade away and finally disappear altogether.

    Gloriousday, if you focus your thoughts on Christ you will soon see that the things of this earth “will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace”.

    # January 28, 2013

  2. gloriousday - the author of this post.

    Thank you Swifttohear, that helped me very much. I really needed it right now. I am trying to hold on to one of my closest friends, we’ve drifted apart (due to life’s circumstances and happenings) and it’s so, so hard to deal with…I don’t know if I can keep the friendship close forever though, I know life must change. But it would be horrible to really lose this friend… :'( tryin to hold back tears now…
    Thank you for reminding me to keep my thoughts on Jesus!!!

    # February 9, 2013