Transcription
[intro music]
Debi Pearl: Papa and I are going to record, so y'all go ahead and shut the door.
Child: Squish the mud between your toes. It tickles. [laughter]
Announcer: How do we know if we have realistic expectations for our kids? Here in our vintage answers for this week, the Pearls share some practical advice.
Debi Pearl: Dear Mike and Debbie, one of my biggest needs is the need to tie strings with my sons. My seven and five year olds and I seem to be like enemies so often. Enemies to me and each other. I get so angry at their childish stupidity. My five year old, especially, is such a mess maker. How many times can one person make the same mess? I don't mean toys on the floor. They're mostly responsible for their own stuff. But bringing in mud, spilling food, toothpaste in the sink constantly. How much is just being a child, and how much is wrong? How can I not get angry? How can I communicate my frustration to them? Should I expect them to care? What should the consequences be when they aren't capable of cleaning up the messes they make?
Michael Pearl: Well, she asked how many times they could make messes like that. About 9,437,000, give or take a million or two. And that's pretty natural. Really, mother, it seems like your heart is more fixed on your floor than it is your children. Many times I've watched my wife turn around and look at one of the boys come tracking in with mud. And what she saw was a little man instead of the mud on the floor. What she saw was a little soul.
Now, all you've got to do to deal with a problem like that, is to keep a mop and a bucket of water. And say, "OK, you've tracked mud in, now clean it up". And once they learn it's their job to clean up behind themselves, they'll stop tracking mud in. If they don't, there will come a day when they'll get grown, they'll leave home, they'll be gone. And what they're going to remember when they picture their mother is their mother standing there with her eyebrows lowered, scowling in disapproval.
It would be a whole lot better for them to remember the muddy floor and a cheerful mother, wouldn't it? So what you really need to do, mother, is get your heart right, and realize the most important thing in the world is your children, and not your floor. And not the things that were spilled.
Announcer: Well, that wraps up this week's archives. We hope you found it as encouraging as we did. Don't forget to check out the specials at Cane Creek Corner.
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I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. 3 John 4
© 1995–2024. No Greater Joy Ministries (NGJ) is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit ministry of Michael and Debi Pearl.
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Once again, I am thankful for another pearl of wisdom. I have this garland of wisdom of pearls that I pull from. Thank you for your minsitry, for being raw with your audience, being real with us mamma's and tellin us like it is. I'm a better momma because of your ministry. I, too, would get upset at the "little" messes my 3 little men would make; I began to do just as you suggested, smile and say well, you drug mud in or you peed all around the toilet, just go clean it up. When my 3 little men get hungry, I let em fix themselves a sandwich and they clean up their mess. It's rather cute to watch 3 boys make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and how messy it can get who dirties (7 butter knives and 7 plates to make 3 sandwiches) yes a man does, heehee and I love it! I love them being men and I love being their momma to serve, love and adore them!