I’m in the midst of reading the book Preparing to be a Help Meet and while reading it I’ve already learned a lot.
I recently went through a harsh and unexpected break up with my boyfriend of 15 months. I wasn’t a Christian during the relationship and was definitely a Grabber as well as an antsy babe. He is completely a Priest type.
Looking back I did so many things wrong and was ruining the relationship day in and day out. I can’t even believe he stayed as long as he did. But God was working through him. After the break up, I turned to Christ and am so thankful for my prince charming to have broken my heart and gotten me here. Although I now am so full of regret that I threw away my Prince.
It should be known that he is not a Christian, yet. I pray he turns to Christianity, for as long as he doesn’t I know I cannot be with him.
He falls completely under the priest category and also a little under the prophet. Whereas I fall under the queen. You can see how to non-Christians who fell under those two roles, didn’t work out so well.
But I know him so well and can see the potential in the Christian man he could be. Oh he would be marvelous and I’ve lost him. Also I don’t know how to talk to him again and make Christianity apparent to him.
Really I’m terrified for him. He was an amazing young man, but with my non-Christian role model and strong queen-like personality, I have pushed him in a terrible direction. He’s become corrupt.
What do I do? Do I let him know I’m here for him and will daily pray for him? Or do I completely leave him alone and pray for him to come back to me?
I’ve changed my ways but I don’t think he’d believe me if I said it. He doesn’t want to deal with the old me again, that’s a for sure, but he doesn’t know how strong the Lord has worked on me and he doesn’t know, I’m willing to be the help meet he would need. I am ready, and see it.
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Being a good help meet starts long before marriage. It is a mindset, a learned habit, a way of life established as a young unmarried girl—or at least that’s the way it should be. Nearly every wife will confess that the first year or two of married life was—how shall I say it—a frustrating learning experience.
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I would just advise you to leave it all in God’s hands…You focous on God and your own pwersonla walk with Christ and as you are continue to pray for Him not that you would both be together but that God would help Him in His walk and that He pursues Christ and as you both are on the path if it is God’s will then He will detour you both back together but if it is not His will then you both should just remaing good friends in Christ 🙂
I echo what proverbs31grl said. I would leave it in God’s hands and trust Him to script your love story. I would pray a lot for this young man. Also pray that God’s will be done in his life and yours, and if that means you two will be together, so be it, and if not, so be it.
Just trust Him…He’ll work it all out and you’ll look back and I guarantee you you’ll be immensely happy with how it all works out as long as you don’t try to push yourself into His plan! He knows what’s best for you–no one else does.
I am so glad that you have trusted Christ to cover your sins, and are following God! What a wonderful choice you have made, and I am sure you will continue to follow God’s path of joy and righteousness! It seems you really love him, but I think sometimes, it is best to let the past be history. Be nice to him sure, but he was most likely your lover, and I think you need to focus on God, not be tempted by a non-Christian man that does not trust or want you. I understand you did some wrong things, but everyone does, and as a Christian you are free from your sin, and can change. Focus on building yourself up, and on working for God. Get some new hobbies, volunteer, save money from working! Learn to sew, cook, manage finances, work on cars, plumbing, building, gardening, homesteading, and any other vocation you may be interested in. Sometimes, I think gals get so focused on finding their true love, and forget that need to work on growing themselves and having a good time in life! Focus on you, and learning to love yourself, otherwise a man’s love will not be sufficient. Learn to love God, otherwise you will look for love in too many wrong places. You seem like a very thoughtful person, and I hope you build on the good characteristics you have! I’d let him go, and focus on seeing the big wide world, and all of God’s awesome creation!
I felt sad reading this because my initial response was “There’s no point flogging a dead horse. That relationship sounds over, girl.”
The truth is I’ve been where you are and painfully (painfully!) had to get over the “man of my dreams”. Ouch!! The consequences of sin are pretty harsh in this lifetime. But I do believe God has better things in store 🙂
Yes, you can talk to him and pray for him. He may or may not be interested. I’m sorry, there are no easy answers as far as I can see. But you are IN CHRIST now, He will carry you through if you lean not on your own understanding but acknowledge God in all your ways. I pray for straight paths for you.
Give this guy over to the LORD in prayer. He’s not your man, at least not now and maybe not ever. But you are Christs and Christ is yours.
Bless you heaps!!