Posted July 2, 2012
What do you think about boys and girls emailing eachother as long as they are talking about about good things and would not be ashamed if their parents or siblings read their emails?
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I don’t have any boy’s emails, but then again, I don’t know too many boys! 🙂 It would probably be fine if you kept the emails pretty impersonal. Maybe just emailing for questions like, ‘are you going to the game?’ and stuff like that would be good.
I think that depends on 1) your age and 2) the purpose of the email. For example, I enjoy music and enjoy playing in different groups. Sometimes it’s necessary to email band members when and where stuff is, etc. and it’s usually a guy in charge. I don’t think an email like that really needs to be chaperoned, especially if it’s a group discussion. On the other hand, there’s the kind of email that is just discussion between you and a guy for the purpose (whether he admits it or not) of getting to know each other for a romantic end. Forwarding these to a parent eliminates most any “danger” in my opinion. But beware of a guy who talks a ton online and doesn’t talk much in person. I think unless you live a great distance apart, there’s no reason the guy can’t make an effort and either a) ask you out, or b) find some other creative way to visit with your family if you don’t date.
My two cents.
Here’s what I do: ALWAYS cc both sets of parents! Everyone appreciates it and your held accountable. If you don’t cc both sets of parents, eventually one of you may say something they shouldn’t have. If you both know that four other people will be reading this email, it’s much better. 🙂
I believe it’s okay for them to email as long as they don’t get too personal.
Emailing is like talking, do you think it is okay to talk to boys? I would email a boy that you are seriously interested in getting to know as a suitable marriage partner, but if you are too young to marry or know you aren’t going to anytime soon…then I would focus my time on something other than a young crush that isn’t going to last. Keep in mind it is easier to lie about yourself in emails, and guys sometimes lie a lot to get a thrill from a girl. If you are going to, be responsible and let your parents and siblings read the emails. Let your loved ones judge whether or not he is a good match for you, if you are at a time when you feel it is appropriate to marry. I would do some funner stuff though. Learn, start a charity, go on adventures.
When you email, you tend to project the kind of person you want the other person to think you are, not the person you really are. It is also easy to get emotionally close really fast. I’m not saying you should never email a guy, but in general it is a bad idea. A few years ago, I emailed a guy about business. I was not interested in him, but wiithin just a few emails, before I even realized what was happening, we started getting too personal. Although we saw each other all the time, we never talked in person; but it was easy to talk through email. Thankfully, my parents were getting copies of my emails and said something.
I would say it definitely depends on the situation. If you see each other regularly, are not of marriageable age, and/or are not in a relationship with the guy; I would say it’s a good idea to keep any e-mails brief {informational} and not too personal. However, I wouldn’t say one way or the other…just talk to your parents and make sure they’re completely comfortable with the idea of e-mailing the guy before you do – and ask for each guy, don’t just assume because your dad approves of one guy that it applies to them all.
It will save you lots of trouble, and will make your relationship – if something comes of it – very special if you hold yourself accountable. See, in my case, I got an e-mail from a young man one day that lives quite a distance away about a business proposition and today – eight months later – we’re in a courtship. Let me just say, you never know…
Thank you all very much! I was wondering this myself and also some other girls asked me what I thought! Thank you. God bless everyone!
Emailing is no exactly the same as talking, in that it is very private. It can be harmless, but it could also be very dangerous, in that it could very well develop from harmless to harmful without you even realizing it.
It would definitely depend on the situation and I think accountability is a must. For me, I do email guys sometimes, but always for ministry purposes and our entire family has one address we use, so everyone can see any email I send or receive. I am the family “secretary” and we do an email prayer chain, so if something comes up, I will email about 35 different addresses with the prayer request- some of whom or guys. But my grandparents get the same emails. 🙂 Sometimes I will also handle more personal communication like last month when I was coordinating a benefit dinner for a homeschool father with a brain tumor. One of my donors was a young man, so we emailed a little. Also, because I do all family correspondence, I sometimes just handle the “how are ya’ll kind of emails”. I try to never let it get to be too much about me- but more about the family. And because we all use one address- and guys know that- they behave quite well. 🙂